I really debated about sharing this.

I hate bad news, and I really dislike sharing it. But since I posted earlier about our three expectant mothers, questions will come up if I don’t share it. This is one reason why I don’t always announce who’s been bred or who is pregnant. Because you never know what will happen. I dislike getting people’s (and my) hope’s up and then be disappointed.

Jules was our first girl “due”. And honestly, the last week or two I’ve questioned if she was even pregnant. She had a bit of a round tummy when I stood her up and felt it, but not like a regular, “oh, wow, that girl is pregnant” look. In fact, a few weeks ago, I had scheduled an x-ray for last week to see how many babies she was incubating and then canceled it because I didn’t think she was truly pregnant. (Dogs can reabsorb puppies during a pregnancy and can have false pregnancies with all the pregnancy symptoms). I believed she might be suffering from one of those.

But there was still a bit of uncertainty so I kept her close and monitored her temperature every couple days to see if that would indicate anything different.

Yesterday morning her temperature was lower than it had been although not as low as a pre-whelping temperature usually is. And she became a bit restless and started arranging her bed or any towel or blanket that she came across.

Later, I switched out the blanket in her crate for several layers of newspapers then put her to bed for the night. I fixed my bed on the couch and got busy with some things. She became increasingly restless, nesting, tearing up the paper in her crate showing the signs that whelping was imminent.

Then around nine o’clock, she delivered one perfectly formed precious pup; but it was a stillborn.

I hate this part of raising dogs. I hate the loss. I hate watching mom grieve and search for her missing puppy (I left it with her for a while, but eventually had to take it away). I hate sharing the bad stuff that happens.

There are so many wonderful moments and memories in the process of raising dogs too, thankfully. But for the time being; we feel the loss.

Jules spent a restless night in her crate and me a restless night on the couch next to her. We’ll give her time. Time to rest, time to heal, time to feel like herself again and look ahead to better days again.